What is the Family?

Kate in a Corner

Leo Tolstoy opened his novel Anna Karenina with the now-famous line: “Happy families are all alike; every unhappy family is unhappy in its own way,” a statement that rings true in the light of those who struggle with both predictable and unpredictable stressors.   While it is true that unhappiness is a unique experience for each family, pain is the great equalizer.  All families hurt.  How they hurt is the distinctive chord, but knowing how to respond to that hurt is what will help unhappy families to remain family to one another.

From the work of Cynthia A. Lietz (2011), who explored the role of empathy in resilient families, it can be determined that every family copes with difficulties, but the resilient ones are those which find happiness.

Happiness comes from the ability to live a meaningful life, and meaning is applied based on the level of empathy attributed to…

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The Key Role of Microexpressions

Human Chess

Dr. Paul Eckman discusses the role of microexpressions, involuntary facial tics triggered when one lies. While they occur in the blink of an eye, they are – in fact — detected and processed by the subconscious mind. As this part of the brain analyzes these gestures, it sends an alert to the conscious mind as a vague sense that something doesn’t “feel right,” or as its more commonly known, a “gut instinct.” As such, you should always trust your instincts,as they are based on legitimate  but incomplete indicators of deceit.

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The Power Of Reframing

Little things that Matter - Lalita Raman

Have you been in meetings where you interpret something that has been said by your boss very differently from what one of your colleagues may have interpreted?
Have you had moments or days when you feel everything is going wrong, until you see someone else having a worse time which pales yours in comparison?
Have you observed situations where two people could have faced the same situation, yet one considers it as a challenge to be overcome whereas the other person dwells on it, complains about it and their body language and facial expression conveys that they are having one a nerve wrecking experience?
How many times have you for any small mistakes made, stated that “I have messed up” instead of “I made a mistake”?
When I coach leaders, executives and professionals, I hear negative statements about who they are or what they are not good at or what…

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3 Traits Leaders Need to Shape a High-Performance Culture

Linked 2 Leadership

Time to Re-Invent

Some businesses focus on creating a culture of fun, so leaders fill break rooms with kegs and fruit snacks. Others pinpoint that they want a culture of transparency, so developers create open forums for inner office dialogue and feedback.

These can be good tactics to employ when working to create a company culture.

But if your culture is tactical and not strategic, these types of approaches ultimately won’t have a large impact on a more important issue — how your company performs.

Creating a High-Performance Culture

A high-performance culture creates a high-performance business.

And to do this, you need leaders who can embed this into company processes.

To create and maintain a high-performance culture, it’s crucial for leaders to be aware of their own beliefs and assumptions about how work should get done. They also need to be aware of how those beliefs influence and reinforce behavior within a company.

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Job Etiquette: Eat, Pray, Find A Job

Job Etiquette By Paula

Over the past week, I have been observing a religious holiday and attending my house of worship. You are probably wondering how I could make a connection about jobs at this time; I would be too! Several people stopped by to exchange greetings and several with stories about relatives or friends who are looking for a job. It’s a four letter word (JOBS) that makes it’s way in many conversations and settings.  Jokingly or not they said they would “pray” for jobs for their loved ones or friends. That’s what got me to thinking about this.

 In my opinion you should not “pray” for a job.

Pray for confidence in your self and your skills.

Pray for courage to accept decisions from employers (positive or negative).

Pray for strength to read postings, send resumes and wait for responses.

Pray for guidance to make the right choices for yourself.

Pray for

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Surround yourself with passionate people

A Heart's Echoes

photoHave you ever listened to someone speak passionately about something?

There’s a sparkle in their wide eyes. They gesture wildly, and talk so quickly it’s like their tongues can never catch up with the thoughts in their heads and neither can you. Yes, sometimes they lose you. Actually, a lot of times they lose you.

But there is something about passionate people that I find quite fascinating. When they speak they get so carried away by the ocean tides of their ideas, they are unanchored, and they tend to pull you with them. In real time, as you listen to them, you might actually be captivated by their manner of speech even if you understand nothing from the content.

Another thing is passionate people are quite rare to find. A lot of reasons contribute to this. A lot of times people are passionate about things they are not really exposed…

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Influencing Without Authority, or Even With It—4 Key Behaviors

Blanchard LeaderChat

bigstock-Silhouettes-of-people--d-20419778“Example is not the main thing in influencing others, it is the only thing.” ~Albert Schweitzer

A common leadership challenge I hear in our workshops is: “How do I lead when I don’t have authority?”

Even when we do have formal authority, we often need to influence up and across the organization. But should we use our authority to coerce others to do what we want or need them to do? I believe the answer is a resounding no, except in two situations:

    1. In a crisis or emergency—there is no time to influence right now.
    2. As a last resort—when you have tried everything to influence, it isn’t working, and “no” is not an option.

    Think about those times when your boss used position power to get you to do something. How did you respond? How did it make you feel?

    Having autonomy—a feeling of choice—is critical to motivation. When we…

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